There are only five Einsteins left, which is especially hard to believe when you consider that we started out with fifteen. What went wrong? Damned if I know. I mean, it was a sensational idea. We were going to help people for a change. None of that big government hocus-pocus so common to projects of the like. Each member of the team was dedicated, not just to the experiment, but to humanity. It should have worked, our intentions were golden...

But I guess I should try explaining that to those poor bastards in Argentina.

Einstein the fourth died in the incubator and Einstein the second broke his neck at the age of two. They were the lucky ones. Einstein the tenth, who took to calling himself Abe, died at the age of seventeen... from syphilis of all things! And the last of the natural unnatural deaths were Frederick and Bobby Einstein who died in a car crash three years ago (Einsteins V and IX respectively). What a waste. They were our physicists!

So there were ten left. All cultured, all educated, all cloned from the original Albert Einstein. Most of them, at least, were pretty bright. The exceptions were Zach and Scott. To our amazement, Scott was downright stupid! Zachary was fairly bright, but never seemed to concentrate on anything for longer than a day. They tell me that he's gone to Europe, drinks a lot, and plays in a Rock and Roll band. Ya' believe it cost us close to thirty mil to give birth to that clown?

Well let me just say that the situation is bad. I'm really not sure that we'll pull through it. In two short years, Theodore Einstein has managed to take over half of South America, the most recent conquest being Argentina. Lucky for us though, he seems to have stopped. Probably doesn't want to spread himself too thin, wants to take some time to secure his holdings. That sonuvabitch! He knows that we have the wrong Einsteins for the job and feels confident in his position.

Understand that our boys aren't dumb, not by a long shot. It's just that their respective specialties aren't even close to what we need. Brandon specialized in agronomy; Sebastian, journalism; Daniel, archeology; and Edward is an environmental engineer. Of course there's Zach, but he's tough to locate and even if that wasn't the case, he would be pretty much useless.

The rest were assassinated. That was before Theodore's intentions were clear to us. Only now do we realize that they were removed because of the threat they posed to Theodore's homeland, New Venezuela. Jonathan, Nicodemus, Paris, Reginald, and Jim; Political scientist, economist, nuclear engineer, and computer scientist. Dead, Dead, Dead, Dead, and Dead!

It is worth mentioning that there was an attempt on Brandon's life as well. While his specialty bares little importance from a political or military standpoint, he does hold the honor (along with Theodore) of being the most brilliant of our Einsteins.

So that's what it's come down to. The farmer vs. the political/military Strategist. It bodes ill for America--for everyone really. Brandon believes that the sooner the war starts, the better it will be for us. And for my two cents, I agree. Not that it matters. Those liberal who's-whos will trample an idea like that into the ground. They don't seem to understand that Theodore has momentum now. He's mobilized, and his country, New Venezuela, will only get bigger and stronger as time goes on. That was our mistake with Hitler for Crissake!

So I fear that we shouldn't fear fear like FDR said. We should worry more about red tape and political atrophy because let me tell ya… When they come through here with their laser rifles, and their hover-tanks, and their ion cannons or whatever the hell else they've got by the time we get our asses in gear, there won't be a damn thing we can do about it. This speck of dirt I'm standing on today will be New New Venezuela or Einsteinland or whatever the hell he's gonna call it. And I'll pick up my revolver and christen this great land with my disintegrating brain. One of a team of forty brains that caused this mess.

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